What was I thinking ?

Its easier said than done. How very true!! Every deliberate attempt to forget it more so bring memories of it – pleasant, unforgettable, that brings a smile on my face. People, music, things, events, expressions, photographs... are all memories, a story from the past expressed without words. Every time someone says “Im not worth it, u deserve much more…” my head turns restlessly in all possible directions to see who that gentle(wo)man is. The only thing that is observed while walking on the roadside is big cars to see if anything is a ML. Lonely stranger, Have u ever loved a woman, It hurts me too… , amazing lyrics, which I have listened umpteen number of times in the past, enjoying every word of it. A movie that was watched, about which I could recollect nothing - the cast and character or the title or the story. Only thing that remained in my mind was two people riding in the horse all thru the movie. The only best profile picture that was always put to sleep in my absence and with all patience, I put it back it in the right way, every time. Heaps of papers, cartons, books left unarranged in a room, which I desperately wanted to set it right everytime I passed by the room. I still remember the days when I struggled hard to complete Ayn Rand’s Fountain Head and Atlas shrugged, just b cos someone told me it’s a nice read. The first sensitive moment and the last one too !! The Park, the temple, the performing arts school, green nest, ibp, red bull, metro dryers, .. Small things yet not so small .. It isn’t about how much pain it brings to me, its just about how it impacted me in many different ways, made me think , ‘How I wish I was there … ‘ It isn’t about what I have lost, its about the moments when I look up to the sky and ask ‘Why am I here’ .. .

God will never leave you empty.
He will replace everything you lost.
If he asks you to put down something,
He wants you to pick up something greater!