Guarding against over parenting

Parenting is truly an art, not all parents learn that and practise that in a way it should. There is a clear demarcation between bad parenting, right parenting or what we say guarding and over parenting. Many years back, I had come through what Bad parenting leads to. And now it is over parenting. I have also been a victim of over parenting during my early days of childhood and teens. When I realised that over parenting will not be good for my future as well as parents, I started moving awayfrom them, given them so many advises on how not to be, what not to expect. I demanded I need to be treated as adult. I dont know if people around me are still feeling Im being over parented, butatleast its not a heavy dosage.

For every parent, their child is their world. They live their life for their children. Right from the day the child is born, they think they have the biggest responsibility of bringing up their child in the best way. They are ready to scarifice anything for their children. Parents are over protective right from childhood, and they wont allow their kid to fall or climb for the fear of getting hurt. What they dont understand is this prevents the child from learning the action and be independent. Agreed that being independent is not something that needs to be practised from the childhood, but childhood years are what they become when they grow. The kids need to be taught what is right and what is wrong, but that should not make them totally dependent on the parents. Parents fail to understand this and they make their child over dependent on them thus robbing them of their self confidence. Parents want to give their child what ever they did not have, so much so that they dont even wait to see if the child is interested in that. They are so worried of not being good parents that they overdo it. And this overdoing doesnt stop after theirchild grows up to teenage or after. It continues even after the child becomes a grown up man. They dont understand that after certain age, children aren’t as naïve and innocent to label them asthey don’t know whats right or wrong. They continue do everything for their son whom they still consider as their small kid. He also takes advantage of it and lets his parents do things that he needs to do, basking in the glory of laziness. He fears explaining to them on spoon feeding and over caring as he thinks its just love and he cant stop the love shower. So he starts enjoying the parental love even to that age. Parents also feel proud that their son always depends on them for his day to day needs and enjoy doing even small little things which the son should have learnt to do it himself. They get involved in all decision making and they feel their ideas/decision are the ones that are always good for their son.
There were times when teachers and paediatricians used to encourage parents to participate actively in all activities of their child during the childhood so that the child grows up to be a responsible citizen. But these same people today have realised that some parents take a little too much interest and tend to overwhelm the child and then the parents continue to do the same evenafter the child grows. And this they call 'over-parenting'. And most experts find that mothers are prone to it and they continue to do that for their over possessivess doesnt leave them. Parents need to do a rethink and put the brakes on. Children grow up fast, they too need to grow up and treat the child as an adult when he turns to an adult and leave him independent.